Nomination at forbiddenawards for The Temptation Award


Also a wonderful, unexpected bounty of noms at the Lie to Me Awards
'The Not A Zeppo Award', 'The Teeny Weeny Award', 'The Laugh, Cheer and Smile Award' and 'The Wish It Were Real Award':







Socks and the Camel's Back


by
KittyPoker1



Xander wasn't happy. Let's amend that. Xander wanted to rend someone limb from limb, tear them a new hole, rip off their head and stomp on their body until only fragments remained. The target of his violent desires was standing in front of him, smirking infuriatingly.

Spike. The love of his life, his reason for living, the frosting on his chocolate cake. Spike.

"Why. Did. You. Do. That?" he asked, in what he fondly imagined to be a patient voice.

"Do what, pet?" Spike drew on his cigarette, taking the smoke deep into his lungs and exhaling perfect white rings which floated slowly towards the yellow-tinged ceiling.

Xander ground his teeth. They'd had this discussion before. He was sure they'd had this discussion before. Oh yes, on several occasions. So why were they having it again?

He narrowed his eyes. "Why did you stuff your filthy, demon-slimed socks behind the sofa cushions instead of putting them in the hamper? It took me two damn days to track down the reason for the stink!"

Spike's brow creased in thought.

Well, that's a fucking first. He's actually thinking.

The vampire shrugged. "Not a big deal, love. I knew you'd find them sooner or later." He almost patted Xander on the back in congratulations.

Xander counted to ten. Then counted to ten again ... backwards.

Spike gazed at him enquiringly, unsure of the reason for the wrathful glares darting in his direction.

"Spike, why the hell should I have to search for them? The hamper is right there in the bathroom. It'd be easier for you to put them in there when you strip for your shower, rather than hide them."

"Wasn't hiding them, exactly. Just wanted to get out of me boots and watch a footie match on the telly before I got in the shower." He became enthusiastic. "Bloody good match it was, too. England versus Croatia. You should've seen Rooney's first goal ..."

"Shut up!" Xander almost screeched. He clenched his fists but resisted the temptation to lay into the blond. Calm, Xander, calm. You love him. Remember? His voice became deceptively mild. "I don't care about football, the American kind or that girl's game you like to call soccer. I just want to know why you have so little respect for my wishes."

Spike was genuinely puzzled. And annoyed. He thought he'd made the transition to domestic bliss pretty well. Wasn't his fault he'd had to live alone for so long. He'd been doing his best to get used to factoring Xander into his life.

"Uh, I do? I thought I had plenty of respect for your wishes. When you want to be sucked off, I pucker up my mouth like a good boy. When you want to be fucked, I lube you up good and proper and screw you into the mattress. When you want to fuck me, I spread my legs and take it like a champ."

Xander paled. "Yeah? Sounds kinda cold. Anybody'd think you were just here for the free beer and blood and sex. And the cable, of course," he added sarcastically. "You sure as hell never clean up after yourself and I'm fucking tired of it. This is your home too. You're a slob!"

"And you're an anally retentive git!" shot back Spike.

"Haven't heard you complaining about it so far." He jumped up and grabbed his jacket. "Right. I think it's time I got out of here for a while. Before we both say something we'll regret." He opened the front door and left the apartment, careful not to slam it shut on his way out. No girly gesture from this manly man.

Spike dropped onto the sofa, stunned. What the hell had just happened? He mentally replayed his words. Oh, maybe not so smart. Could've expressed himself better. He loved living with Xander. Loved having sex with him every night and waking up curled around his human warmth every morning. Loved sharing coffee and waffles once they finally got up after a long, leisurely, mutual blowjob. Loved the fact that Xander was completely unfazed when he flavoured his breakfast with blood rather than maple syrup. Bugger it, he just loved Xander.

He rose to chase after the younger man but quickly thought better of it. Xander needed some alone time. He'd made a mistake but he'd make it right when his lover came home.





Xander walked aimlessly for a while, heading towards the funfest known as Sunnydale Central. Damn it, where was there to go in this town if you wanted to have a good sulk? No point going to The Bronze. His friends would be there but he couldn't stand the thought of Buffy's grin of triumph when she found out he'd had a fight with Spike. She'd never approved of their relationship and he wouldn't be able to resist the urge to spill. I told you so.

He found himself on a side street and saw a discreet sign outside a darkened doorway. 'Heaven'. What the hell? A figure bumped into him as it hurried past, towards the doorway. "Hey, buddy, watch it."

"Sorry, sorry. It's just ... they close the doors at 11.00 o'clock, you know? So the cops don't get bent out of shape about what goes on. Hell, some of them turn up here after their shift."

"What goes on?" Xander was intrigued.

"Well, it's a gay club, isn't it? Thought you knew that, thought everyone knew that. The only one in town, so ... shhh, gotta be careful to keep it, you know, quiet. People know what happens here but they don't want it shoved down their throats." He giggled unnervingly.

The little man hurried on through the door and Xander decided to follow him. He'd never been to a gay club. He hadn't even known he was gay until a few months ago. He still wasn't completely sure about whether he was a bender, despite having had sex with Spike frequently and in every possible position. Some he'd thought were impossible. Spike was incredibly flexible. The way he could suck the head of Xander's cock while Xander was riding him ... He shivered at the memory.

After paying the extortionate entrance charge -- one drink free -- Xander ambled into the club and made his way to the bar. He propped himself against the counter and smiled sweetly at the pretty blonde bartender. She looked harassed and in need of a kind word.

"Hi, sweetheart. I've got this voucher. Gets me a free drink."

"Gets you a free soda." She looked appraisingly at Xander. She could spot a switch-hitter when she saw one. He might be willing to change sides, at least for a night. And he was the prettiest punter she'd come across in quite some time. Broad, strong body his clothes couldn't quite hide and a sweet, sweet smile. "How about I throw a bit of JD into that coke, just for flavour?"

Xander wasn't stupid, despite popular opinion. He knew when he was being hit on.

"Wouldn't mind, babe. But don't get the wrong idea. I'm a one-guy guy. My guy's not here right now, but ..."

She sighed unhappily. "Yeah, I get it. I'm sleeping alone tonight. But the offer stands. You seem nice."

"Thanks. And the acceptance stands ... for JD. You seem nice too. If things were different ..."

She looked at him shrewdly. "You're not sure. You're thinking about it. Whether you want a man or a woman, I mean."

Xander looked away from her bright stare. "It's not a male/female thing. It's him. I love him. I'm just pissed at him right now." A thought struck him. "If you're looking for a straight boyfriend, what are you doing working in a gay club?"

She blushed. "I tried working in straight clubs and bars but the guys here are a lot easier to get along with, you know? They don't give me a load of crap."

"Well, they woudn't," said Xander, dryly. "They're not exactly panting after your cute little ass."

"You'd be surprised how much action I get," she replied smugly. Her face fell. "It's just, they always go back to the boyfriend the next morning. Don't even stick around for breakfast, most of the time."

"I'd do the same thing, so it's better if we're up-front. I like you, and you're damned easy on the eye, and if I wasn't a married man ..."

"I like you too. Come back some time soon. I'd like to meet your boyfriend. Husband." She smiled. "He's a lucky man."

"No, I'm a lucky man." Xander smiled hugely. "I am a lucky man. What the hell am I doing here when I could be at home, snuggling with my honey?"

"Dunno. Go. Go, now. Kiss him for me."

Xander leant over the bar and planted a smacker on her cheek. "Thank you."





He was on the point of diving out of the club and running all the way home but stopped at the edge of the dance floor. No. If I don't make Spike understand that I'm really mad at him, this thing is going to come back to bite us on the ass again. Gotta stay away long enough to make him think about it. Anyway, I feel like dancing. Okay, I feel like flailing around pathetically. To music.

His mouth dropped open when he noticed a handsome, blond, blue-eyed man eyeing him hungrily. The blond opened his arms and Xander moved slowly into them, hypnotised. They began to sway to the music, bodies fitting together like pieces of a jigsaw. Xander's cock swelled inside his jeans, pressing painfully again his zip. He raised a hand and pressed the fair head against his shoulder, caressing soft, silky curls. He could feel his dancing partner's erection against his groin and groaned when the man's arms crept around his neck. Their mouths met, teeth clashing and tongues sliding, hips thrusting urgently to try to find the relief that only friction could bring.

Shit, I'm going home with this guy tonight. I don't care about anything else; I've got to have him. I am sooo gay.

"You washed your hair," he murmured. "And no starch."

"Yeah," rumbled Spike. "You like it like this ... don't you?"

"Yeah," sighed Xander. "I love it like this. Love you, baby." His head dropped to Spike's neck and he licked the cool, clean, sweet-smelling skin, concentrating on his claim mark.

Spike shuddered and his cock twitched. "Sorry, Xan. I know I was a wanker. I'll do better, promise. I love you too."

"Shhh." Xander kissed him softly. "Show, don't tell. Let's go home now so you can show me."





Xander's awe-struck gaze travelled around the apartment. It was pristine, sparkling clean. He checked out the bathroom, the bedroom, the kitchen. Every surface had been scrubbed or polished to within an inch of its life. He turned around to look at Spike, who was looking back at him anxiously. "You ..?"

"Is it okay? 'Cos, I've never really done this before. Always had minions to do the cleaning up bit."

Xander smiled affectionately. "No need to ask what you've been doing while I've been gone. This must have taken you hours."

"Well, yeah. But you were pissed off at me and I hate that, so I figured I ought to do something so's you'd know I got it. Why you were so annoyed."

Spike was really good at the showing thing.

"I get it, Spike. I do. You love me and you'd even ruin your manicure to prove it." He picked up one of Spike's hands and raised it to his lips. He turned it over and kissed the palm then each finger tip in turn before sucking the index finger into his mouth, fellating it agonisingly slowly.

Spike's gaze was locked on his mouth. "Xaaan ..." he moaned piteously.

Xander pushed him down onto the sofa. "You wanted to say something?"

Spike was panting needily, his hips rising in invitation.

Xander dropped to his knees and pressed his lips against Spike's cotton-clad groin, mouthing the hard column pushing up against his buttoned fly. He leant back and snapped the buttons open, smiling when Spike's rigid erection popped out. "So beautiful, so lovely," he murmured, as he moved forward again and swiped his tongue up the hard length then swirled it around the swollen glans until it glistened under the room lights.

"I ..." gasped Spike. "I'm supposed to be making it up to you. I'm supposed to ... aah!"

"You are making it up to me, baby. Sucking you into oblivion is my idea of vengeance."

A shaky but happy giggle escaped from his love and Xander's grin broadened.

The giggle was stifled as Xander took Spike's cock deeply, his tongue never still, his throat closing around the thick, solid shaft.

Spike grabbed handfuls of dark brown, soft hair and kept Xander's head firmly in place as he tried not to thrust too deeply into his boy's mouth, aware of the fragility of his human mate.

Xander sucked and licked firmly, the vampire writhing beneath him as he bobbed up and down on his lover's prick.

Spike arched, his body only connected to the sofa by his elbows and the backs of his knees. His semen shot down Xander's welcoming throat and leaked from the sides of the man's mouth. The tip of Xander's pink tongue crept out to lick up the last few drops. Spike's head lolled back as he relaxed back onto the cushions and he smiled. "So that was my punishment, was it?"

"Yep. Consider yourself forgiven, baby. Now, what was it you said earlier tonight, about shagging me into the mattress? I think I could deal."





The End




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